Sometimes I feel as if I ought to post something, anything… but really, I don’t have anything noncontroversial to say, so I’ve just dropped by Xanga to say I was here.
But now I feel like writing something, dang it… but what?
I suppose I should say that I only have two weeks left of classes, which I am incredibly grateful for… more than grateful – ecstatic. I get to a point every year where I question why it is that I enrolled again, and what this degree is worth in terms of time and money. The truth is that this is probably my last year to just goof off before settling into a career, so shouldn’t I enjoy it? The only trouble is that I have all these papers to write and books to read – so my goofing off time gets swallowed up by school work – *sigh*.
In addition, I’m busy avoiding people I live with and near. As nice as everyone is – sometimes I just want them to all go away and be replaced by my real friends… people I love and who love me. There’s this little problem of distance though. Whose idea was it to move here? Oh yeah… mine.
Well now I feel as if I ought to qualify everything I’ve just said and restate that I’m enjoying it here, and have found the program to be interesting… and I’m learning a lot. Have I yet mentioned I miss having a car? Because I do. A lot.
Oh – and it’s getting cold… not ready-to-snow kind of cold, just wear-a-warm-coat kind of cold. I wouldn’t want to be in Wisconsin right now because of the weather, which makes me wonder, “Will I ever be able to endure a winter there?” I suppose I better learn to deal with it.
Or perhaps I can convince Nick to pursue desert landscaping… I’ve always wanted to live in the Gulf. The Persian Gulf I mean. Perhaps Dubai? I hear they have a lot of positions available. But then again, I keep getting these stupid emails from the State Department and I’m half-tempted to just apply and see what happens. But what if I got the job somehow? I wonder if I’d even qualify for secret service clearance though.
*sigh* I’m all confused. And I have this lecture about the US midterm elections to go attend. Yes, they care about that here. See everyone in the world, except the majority in America, realizes the importance of American policies. I wish more of us cared. Perhaps then there wouldn’t be so much poverty or hunger or war. Maybe I’m an idealist. I kind of like that about me though.
Ok, sorry for the babble – I’m really going now. =)
17 Responses to “Fantastic babblings”
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Twitter: EstherCrawford
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December 7th, 2006 at 10:46 am
You’re real friends who love you will be there asap…
December 6th, 2006 at 9:53 am
ryc ~ now, esther, you know i have nothing but respect for you and your incredibly brilliant opinions. but i’m way too shallow for that book recommendation of yours…i need more fluff! ;-) (but, thank you, and it sounds perfect…for YOU)
December 4th, 2006 at 8:57 pm
Ha! I love your profile pic!
December 3rd, 2006 at 9:57 pm
Hopefully, these next two weeks pass quickly and successfully, calmly for you. What to do after? Three weeks off and back to studies, or what? I did not go on for a Masters so I can only admire your guts from afar. Best wishes.
December 3rd, 2006 at 12:58 pm
Thank you for sharing your inside thoughts and feelings. I just read a comment of yours on Chelsea’s blog and I just can’t help but find myself falling head over heals for you. Is that odd to say? Well, I just find you fascinating and seriously the way you continue to inneract with this broken world we live in impresses the hell out of me. Good job on living. This place is hard and messy and sadly so dark at times, but you love God, you love people for real and you have more fight in you than just about anyone I have ever come across. So again, you are allowed to be “confused” and human. Thanks for your honesty and transparency.
December 2nd, 2006 at 6:59 pm
Oh come on Jonathan you know that deep down inside you are aching for the tithing envelope!
Esther we love you and miss you a WHOLE BUNCH!
December 2nd, 2006 at 2:23 pm
I said changing, don’t send me a membership button or tithing envelope just yet.
December 2nd, 2006 at 11:59 am
haha… I knew you’d come around brother. They are a great rock band & they (or at least Bono) cares about the world. Good combo, mmhmmm =)
December 1st, 2006 at 12:33 pm
Ok, Maya Angelo said it takes courage to change and admit you are wrong. Last night I watched a U2 concert on Direct TV. I virtually stand up and publically say my opinion of U2 is changing.
December 1st, 2006 at 11:22 am
but i LIKE the controversial posts… please don’t hold back on us!
November 30th, 2006 at 11:56 pm
Just curious… do you have any opinion about USA’s national debt? Do people talk about that immense debt when they talk about the US’s values and example?
November 30th, 2006 at 10:46 pm
we miss you….
November 30th, 2006 at 9:56 pm
Yeah, and my grad school experience was a lot like K-5…
Still, it’s good to know what you’re thinking.
November 30th, 2006 at 1:42 pm
As long as they don’t take your family into consideration for a security clearance you’ll be fine – and ditch this blog. You’ve been tough on Bush here. Instead of a CIA desk job, you might end up in a CIA non-disclosed prison somwhere. A lawyer in Oregon was just awarded 2 million clams for being illegally detained for two weeks for Patriot Act violations because he counseled Muslims in the Portland area and then was linked to the London Bombings after a “mistake” at the CIA fingerprinting lab. In 2003, a Public Defender was arrested and interrogated by the feds for five hours after he said Bush was “out of control” on an Internet chatroom he visited at a public academic library in New Mexico.
I’m very proud of you Esther. I love and miss you. (They have graduate schools in Oregon you know. Tuition would have been cheaper too!)
November 30th, 2006 at 1:36 pm
Oh the ups and downs of graduate work. I am there too. I just want to curl in a ball and sleep, and then when I do, I wake up half-scared and pour into my readings. Then I want to go to sleep again. It’s really a vicious cycle.
November 30th, 2006 at 12:13 pm
From one idealist to another, that was a most enjoyable post! Nice to hear from you!
November 30th, 2006 at 12:03 pm
I have a friend who’s applying for a job as a jazz guitarist at a resort in Dubai. If you ever up and move there, let me know and I’ll put you in touch.